I've Been Through Worse

Today, I propped a pic on my monitor. Everybody was asking who was with me. I said it was my ex. One brave soul asked why I had it there. I said it was to remind me that I've been through worse. That whatever I'm going through right now, I know I can get through it because I was able to recover from our relationship.

You see, that relationship had a big impact on my life. He was my world. Our relationship was all that mattered. And when we broke up, there was no me. Just a vague idea that somehow the idea of me existed and maybe I can make it exist again.

Recovering from the breakup was and is an uphill climb. Im checking myself religiously. Im giving myself a hug when Im doing something right. Im consoling myself when I remember what happened and the feelings get the best of me. Im affirming myself when insecurities eat my guts.

And now that Im having a challenging month at work, I unearthed the pic again. It reminds me that I've been through worse and that whatever Im going through now is nothing compared to what I went through with our breakup.

"Is he the hubby?" one brave soul asked.
"Nope."
"Then who is he?" she asked again.
"My ex." I answered and smiled.
I felt her confusion. And I smiled again.
"But you looked so happy together."

Yes we were happy. But that happiness was long gone before we ended the relationship. Still we tried to hang on. Only to find out that we were hanging by a fragile thread. A thread that broke easily when somebody tugged on it.

I've been through worse. Thanks my dear.